It’s been a long time since I was really stunned speechless

But this came close. The post that started this monumental thread over at The Nation of Riflemen?
“I Don’t DO Math” by Jay C. Odaffer
Stunning. A brief sample to start you out:
It happened again. This happens every semester. It’s become a sort of sick game for me, trying to guess which of my students it will be. Sometimes after the first test, most likely after the mid-term, at least one student will walk into my office to find out why he or she did so poorly on the exam for one of my science classes and inevitably declare, “Well, I skipped THOSE questions because I don’t DO math.”
Right. Neither do dogs. Parrots can. So can apes. But dogs, cats, and apparently assorted products of America’s secondary education system who’ve gone on to college, just don DO math.
It’s a looooooong thread, and a bit rough and tumble at times, but worth the read.